Pitchforks and Sundaes

I think it's inevitable to get nostalgic when one has reached a crossroads in their life, when one stands at that pitchfork in the road between what was, what is and what could be, and starts to wonder which road will take you to a spoon and the Hot Fudge Sundae (yum).

So right now I'm feeling nostalgic. Years ago I lived in the states, made friends, expirienced things differently than I do and did upon moving back to the island during those very impressionable teenage years. Throughout the twenty or so years I've been back here I've often wondered about the people I knew, what are they doing, where has the road of life taken them (that sort of thing). I realize that just because some of my friends from my "other life" pop into my head at times, that doesn't in any way mean I have ever popped into theirs. Still, when a find myself feeling out of sorts and wondering what's next, what do the Powers that be have in store for me, I ponder about my life, what was, what is and what could be.

The Boyfriend doesn't fully understand why I want to reconnect with people I haven't seen or spoken to in twenty years. He feels they've lived their lives, gotten married are working and are doing their thing. The thing is, these people were a part of who I was then and in some small way who I turned out to be as an adult.

I don't want to relive the past, I look forward to my future. I'm curious is all. My past is a part of my life, those expirences that I lived helped shape who I am today. My love of writing, and reading is a product of that time and my second grade teacher Mrs. Marcucci, who was one of the coolest teachers ever. I remember Judy Blume and Roald Dahl, field trips to the Public Library (I still have my library card), and writing for the school newspaper in fifth grade. I have tons of fond memories and wonder what became of Mrs. Marcucci. I wish I could let her know what a profound effect she had in my life, and how fondly I remember her and many of my other teachers and friends.

Nevertheless, while I become iluminated or get shoved in the right direction I'll enjoy my little side trip stroll down memory lane, no harm done afterall.

Now What?

After 15 years I'm finally a college graduate! Wow!!!!! Now what?

Okay, the excitement is over, I've got a degree in English Literature. Now what?

Finding work is a challenge, for various reasons:
1-with the current state of economic affairs, companies are downsizing, closing or not hiring.
2- unemployment in Puerto Rico is very high right now.
3- I'm limited in my amount of available working hours since I have four children I need to raise and very little, if no help in that department.
4- on the island, there doesn't seem to exist any outside resources or programs to aid single parents who want to have a better quality of life for their children and themselves. (If there are any I am unaware of them)

I love to write and communicate, it's a passion I've had since I was a child, when I used to write "Barbie Goes Bowling" stories in my spiral notebooks. I also think I'm very good at writing, I know that I can improve in certain areas, but that comes with practice and experience. So I keep wondering how can I make my passion work in my favor, how can I make a living from writing here (P.R.)? The answer of course is... I haven't the faintest idea!

I'm a college graduate! I have a degree! Now what?